Weakness

When You’d Rather Take Control Than Wait

~ alicia.ruth.yoder ~ 13 Comments

When You’d Rather Take Control Than WaitI’ve never been very good at waiting.

It’s like my heart has little hands that want to grab onto the situation’s throat and say, “Isn’t there something more productive I could be doing right now?”

When we decided to purchase our double-wide home in May, we had no idea what the process would look like. After five months of delayed court hearings, paperwork, and moving permits, it feels like the end of a pregnancy—sure to happen sometime, but with no idea when the contractions will come. . .

. . . When we will finally be able to settle into our own place and watch Isaiah run around in the dramatically increased square footage.

Much of my life so far has involved waiting for something. This time, Christopher’s dad has taken care of so many details to make this a reality, and yet there is a constant temptation to feel impatient, discontent, and despair that our dream will dissolve into a mirage.

Worrying about it feels like I’m accomplishing something. Forgetting about it feels irresponsible somehow.

Jesus asked his disciples, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?” (Luke 12:25-26)

It’s like Jesus is saying to me, “I’ve got this, daughter. Resting in Me will be a lot more peaceful. I promise.”

I’ve wanted to pretend that I can be God just as well as He can. That if He would do what I want, we’d both end up feeling good about the situation. (Kind of like my 2 year old son trying to convince me that cereal would be a healthy choice for breakfast, lunch and dinner.)

My Thoughts, God’s Thoughts

When You’d Rather Take Control Than WaitMy friend Jewel recently shared with me about a book by missionary Amy Carmichael called, His Thoughts Said. . . His Father Said. . .

Jewel said she’s taken the format of the book for her own prayer journaling. On the top half of the page, she writes out her thoughts, fears, and worries. On the bottom half, she writes the truths and verses God shows her as His Spirit works through the tangle of her emotions.

Though I haven’t had much time to journal in these toddler-filled days, I’ve tried to go through the same exercise verbally in my prayer time (or at random moments when my emotions decide I just need to have a good cry).

These prayers of admitting my weakness have helped immensely in freeing my worried thoughts and reminding me to thank God for the answers He brings.

Here are some verses God has brought to mind as I’ve struggled through worries about finances, parenting, relationships, and feelings of insignificance:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. . . He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:28, 32)

“For every animal of the forest is mine,
and the cattle on a thousand hills. . . for the world is mine, and all that is in it.” (Psalm 50:10-12)

“For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.

“In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.” (Ephesians 1:4-10)

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” (Ephesians 2:10)

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.”  (1 John 5:14)

“Abba, Father,” [Jesus] said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” (Mark 14:36)

Another resource God has used to help me let go of my thoughts and embrace His has been a devotional by Sarah Young called Jesus Calling. Like Amy Carmichael, Sarah went through a similar process of surrendering her thoughts to God and listening to the truth He was saying back to her.

Drowning is Not An Option

When You’d Rather Take Control Than WaitMy friend Elizabeth reminded me that following what God has for us is “very much like walking on water. . .

“Sometimes I gaze at God and I can feel the impossible turning firm beneath the soles of my feet, and sometimes I look at all I have to do and start freaking out and I can feel the salt water starting to go up my nose, but He never lets me go down. These are the only two options. And drowning is not an option. He won’t let me.”

Our loving Father delights in using our Spirit-shaped desires to bring Him glory and to bring us joy.

Maybe there’s a desire in you that feels like it will never be fulfilled.

Maybe He’s getting the details together to answer your request even better than you would have imagined.

Or maybe, He’s waiting for you to invite Him to fill it with Himself.

What worries do you need God’s truth to cover today? What is He saying back to you?

When Your Weakness is Beautiful

~ alicia.ruth.yoder ~ 12 Comments

When Your Weakness is BeautifulThe pain crept in slowly, but by the time I laid my head on the pillow, I was nearly in tears. It wasn’t only the stiff throbbing that had settled again in my neck and shoulders.

It was the fear that I would be forced to go back in time and relive the ten years of daily chronic pain and thought patterns that accompanied it.

Christopher prayed for me, and the next day I felt so much better. But when the pain started to sneak back the following day, I was ready to start paying more attention to my limitations and take the physical, mental, and spiritual rest that I needed to find relief from the pain.

Why would God want to use someone so. . . weak?

When Your Weakness is BeautifulIn our culture, women are supposed to be able to do it all–hold a job, raise children, work out at the gym, cook and eat healthy meals (from their own garden), and still find time for relationships.

As believers, we don’t only want to keep our children alive, but we want to shepherd their hearts. We want to respect and bless our husbands. We want to serve as members of the Body of Christ. We want to engage with people on a heart level and pray for their needs.

If we were stronger and had more stamina, wouldn’t we be able to do more for God?

Boasting About Weakness
In 2 Corinthians 11:16-12:10, Paul talks about all the hardships he endured for the sake of the gospel. (think prison, floggings, stonings, and shipwrecks)

He could have gone around telling people how he’d stood strong in his suffering and was still doing the Lord’s work.

He could have told people that they should be able to do it all, too.

But in His infinite wisdom and love, God gave Paul a thorn in his flesh. He begged for God to take it away, but he received an answer better than healing.

He received a new perspective.

” But [God] said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” (2 Corinthians 12:8) 

When our strength, efficiency, and accomplishments are taken off like layers of a ball gown and we stand there shivering in our undergarments, there is still Someone who can never be removed because He lives inside of us.

When Your Weakness is BeautifulThe God who designed each galaxy and forms every one of the billions of cells in every person on the planet chose to send His Son to pay for our sins, so that He could dwell in us and do beautiful works through us.

After Job lost everything and was sitting in the dust, scraping at his sores, he said, “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him .” (Job 13:15) By the end of the book, he knew the power of the God he served. “My ears had heard of you
    but now my eyes have seen you.” (Job 42:5)

Maybe you were up all night with the baby, your husband came home from work discouraged, and when you finally sat down to read a novel, a friend called who needed encouragement.

Maybe you feel you have nothing left to give.

Or maybe it’s just a constant stream of daily tasks and responsibilities that seem manageable when you look at each day separately, but as the weeks go by, the water pressure keeps carving out a canyon in your heart.

The Shortest Prayer
If you look at God’s redemption story, woven from Genesis to Revelation, you can see that one of God’s deepest desires is for us to look to Him.

So when you don’t know what to say to yourself or others, try praying this: “Jesus.”

You can even whisper it if you’re in the middle of Walmart or holding a sleeping baby.

And then the Spirit may give you a few more words. Maybe just two: “Jesus, help!”

Maybe more.

When we let our Father take charge, we allow His power to work through us whenever He chooses. We don’t try to work ourselves to death trying to make it happen.

God used a barren woman to birth a nation.

God used a shy murderer to lead a people out of slavery in Egypt.

God used a teenage girl to raise the Messiah.

He didn’t have to use them. But when he did, there could be no doubt Who was doing the work.

So why does God bother to use humans at all?

Because He’s crazy about us. He created us in His image and calls us His children. (Romans 8)

When Your Weakness is BeautifulRight now, Christopher and I are celebrating each new word Isaiah learns. We can’t stop laughing when he sees a toy and shouts, “Awesome!” or drops something in his bib and says, “Oh, shoot.”

Don’t you think the Father who knit our bones and muscles together might feel the same way about us?

As we spend time in His Word and in prayer (including the one word ones), He’ll show us what to spend our energy on. As we let Him into all our weak areas, He may not fill us with strength. But it may open the way for something better–a deeper intimacy with Him.

Are you in?

Why Women in the Church Can’t Be Cheerleaders on the Sidelines

~ alicia.ruth.yoder ~ 4 Comments

Why Women in the Church Can't Be Cheerleaders on the SidelinesDid you know that during World War I, more American women died in childbirth than American men died on the battlefield?

Women’s healthcare improved dramatically the next year once women we able to vote, but the pain of Eve’s curse hasn’t gone away.

Every day I am reminded of my physical weakness as I go about my daily tasks. I tire easily. I can’t open jars. When extra things are jammed into my daily toddler-filled schedule, I can barely keep up.

Sometimes I wonder. . .

Why did God make us physically weaker than men?

Why would he want to use us in our hormone-charged limitations when there’s another gender out there that doesn’t ride out their emotions on a 28 day cycle?

Fight Like a Girl
I recently listened to a talk by Bible teacher Jen Wilkin, who explored biblically what it means to “fight like a girl,” (referring to the female empowerment campaign that ran during the Superbowl).

She asked, “Are women’s contributions to the church nice but not necessary?”

Why were women created in the first place?

In Genesis 2, God created Eve to be Adam’s helpmate and work together in the beauty of the Garden. It wasn’t good for him to be alone.

So what does it look like for women to be, as Jen puts it, “co-laborers in the fight, and not cheerleaders on the sidelines?”

In Exodus 1-2, the Hebrews living in Egypt had multiplied so much that Pharaoh started to get scared. He told the Hebrew midwives to kill all the baby boys that were born, but that they could keep the girls alive. Since the midwives feared God more than Pharaoh, they told him that the Hebrew women kept giving birth before they had a chance to get there.

How many baby boys were saved because of these women, eventually growing up and guiding their families across the Red Sea to freedom?

Moses’ mother hid him after he was born, and God used him to lead the people out of Egypt.

Pharaoh underestimated these women.

Why Women in the Church Can't Be Cheerleaders on the SidelinesI’m grateful for our culture’s desire to value women.

But the beauty of womanhood is not in our ability to be equal to men.

God has gifted members in the Body of Christ differently, so that He can use us to touch all kinds of people.

Here are five ways God may want to use us because we are women:

1. Women are compassionate.

2. Women can empathize.

3. Women are brave. (Like a shepherdess who guards her sheep against a lion)

4. Women understand powerlessness better than men.

5. Women see needs that men may not see.

Men might unintentionally overlook widows, orphans, single moms and hurting children. They may not perceive when someone is living in fear.

They probably won’t ask:

Who might need to be nurtured?

Who might need someone to listen to their confusing flurry of emotions?

Why Women in the Church Can't Be Cheerleaders on the SidelinesA Parable for the Gospel
Jen Wilkin shared that when a woman gets pregnant, she makes herself weak for a designated period of time, delivers another by the shedding of blood, is restored to her former strength, and lives to intercede for that new life.

Could there be a clearer physical parable for the gospel? (Check out Philippians 2:6-11)

“Women, you are not an afterthought. What you contribute to the mission of the church is not of secondary importance.” (Jen Wilkin)

Are you ready to give Him the chance?

Click here to listen to Jen Wilkin’s 35 minute talk (with more humor and insight than I can usually conjure up).

Jen also has an excellent article on her blog about women and the church entitled, “More Pressing Than Women Preachers.” Click here to check it out.